Beverly Hill grade school

(Beverly Hills second grade classroom)

teacher O.K. children, settle down. Today's discussion will introduce you the stock market. As you may not know, the stock market is the backbone of the economy.
Billy (blurts out) My daddy says the stock market is controlled by fear and weed!
teacher That's good Billy, but some commodities are not represented by the stock exchange. Can you name something that is?
Billy Slush funs?
teacher O.K. Billy....
Susie (interrupts) Fear and greed are an oxymoron, no one is afraid to be greedy, and the world stock exchanges are routinely manipulated by those that understand the economy. Those that do not work for the government!
Teacher Susie! Please sit down!
Tommy My daddy is a stock breaker and he is afraid of mommy and he says mommy is greedy.
Teacher Yes Tommy... now children ...
Mary My daddy is a slush an he...
teacher MARY!!
Mary (tears in her eyes) ...he doesn't even have fun.
Susie Your daddy obviously did not diversify his investments.
teacher Children!!!
Billy My daddy is a stock maker too and he says Tommy's daddy is an inside trader. Can't your daddy come in too?
Susie You cannot be a successful investor without some inside information. Your father is obviously duped by the ethics aimed at the lower classes.
teacher ?X!!...??

A large house seemingly in the middle of the street and shadowing the
whole neighborhood. Even the streetlight retreats it's influence.
This ominous structure is very familiar to the whole neighborhood yet
if you ask, no one can seem to tell you exactly where it is located.

Many people come and go this structure yet none are recognized, or even
seen in the process, yet somehow all seems normal.

Some nights the dim light sheds inaudible voices of every kind of mood
and tone. I am sure the source is the structure but cannot in confidence
point it out. The general mood of the tone is that of intrigue.

Anyone of us can easily approach this neighborhood anomaly. We are in
no fear, yet, somehow we avoid it and during casual discourse no re-
solution of it's existence seems necessary. In fact, it seems trivial
even writing about it.

I, however am of a nature to examine that of which others find unworthy
of interest.

So! Now that I have taken interest I feel that I am known, and I am
afraid. My petty insights may yet be my undoing and I seek protection
in casual discourse. I must prove that I am of no interest and try to
fade back into the neighborhood.

Sorry, I do not know where it is located.

Liberal Hunting

There's he is! Yea! Right fucking there! Wait! Oh yea! There he is! Little to the... BINGO! Oh he's a tricky bastard. Thought I saw him before but wasn't sure till he turned sideways. HA HA! In my cross hairs now you weasel sombitch! Uh oh! There he goes! Shit! Can't see em now he's facing me. Should a popped his weasel ass when I had the chance. Too late now. Ah for cryin out loud I wasn sure. Chameleon bastard impersonating my friends and neighbors. I'm the one with a gun, sittin out in the open under a glaring neon light and this suicidal survivalist bastard carries around his own bushes and shadows, Struts where he pleases pissin everybody off. What a fucking hoot. Pops out of nowhere and flips me off and disappears before I can even take aim. I need some new fucking wire I think he likes the stuff I'm usin. One time I was sure I would get him but wasn't locked and loaded. The mother fucker hopped my wire, ran up and handed me some ammo. I couldn't shoot em so close and in front of the kids! And he wouldn't fucking leave till I fell asleep. Glad my grand daddy ain here ta see this shit. He'd shoot us both

Analysis of a Crisis

Iran to US - Screw you and the Jews!
Jews - (uh oh! hear we go again)

US to Iran - OK let's talk
Iran to US -OK! Screw you!

US to Iran -What is your definition of 'Screw'
Iran to US -'you'
Jews -(phew!)

US to Iran - OK! let's talk some more!
Iran to US - OK! Screw you some more! And Screw the Jews too!
Jews - (That's it! Were goin underground!)

US to self -We are still hoping for a diplomatic resolution.

(time passes)

US to Iran -Remember Sadaam?
Iran to US - Hell yea, thank you! And screw you! Oh yea, and the Jews too!

US to UN - Did you hear that shit?
UN to US - Something about 'you' and the Jews?
US to UN -Well?
UN to US -Tell the Jews to bend over!
US to UN -They already did!
Jews to US - Uh? Let's wait and see what happens!
US to UN - Yea let's wait and see what happens!
UN to US - Well what the hell else can ya do? SHEEZ!

(time passes)

US to Iran -OK! Screw you too! So nanar nanar!
Turkey to US - Cool!
Turkey to Iran-Nanar Nanar!
Iran to Turkey-Screw you too!
UN to US -Let's wait and see what happens!
US to UN - OK but we gotta exorcise our military muscle or it will shrink.
UN to US -30%?
US to UN - Let's wait and see what happens!

(time passes)

US to UN -Israel is going underground and we may not have enough money!

Turkey to US -You jerk offs!
US to Turkey -Here have some more money.
Korea to US - What about us?
US to Korea - Screw you! On second thought, wait a minute!!

US to UN -We don't what to do!
UN to US -That's cuz your warmongers!
US to UN -Hey! These boys are determined to screw somebody.
UN to US -We have faith they will use condoms.
US to UN -Aw for cryin out loud! You built another condom factory when we weren't
looking?